The Accidental Bulimic

Hey, all. Long time no see, right? Yeah, I apologize for that. It's been a busy couple months (as most of you that read this know), and my "sittin' around time" just ain't what it used to be. So what's actually been going on? Well, lots of stuff (although I'd be hard-pressed to say that I actually remember much of it), but mainly just life (which itself is mainly school). Nothing memorable, except a much-needed and fairly restful thanksgiving break.

Allow me to do some explaining about the post title: about a year or so ago, I broke up with my girlfriend of nearly five years. Despite the fact that I did the breaking, it was still an extremely stressful time. Add to this a bad car accident that completely rearranged my priorities, and you get one miserable year. A sort of breaking process, if you will. In any case, during this time period, I started having problems with my stomach. It seemed like whatever I ate, I couldn't keep it down for more than a few minutes before I had to rush to the bathroom to get rid of it. I never actually felt sick, but somehow my gag reflex just decided that whatever I ate would look much better somewhere else: in a toilet bowl, perhaps, or on the pavement, or maybe in a bush (if one was handy). Gross? Yes.

This continued for awhile and seemed to slack off during the summer, at which point I had my life mostly under control. I mentioned it to my doctor at a physical, but she (like me) attributed it to the stress of several major life changes in a short period of time, which was a perfectly plausible cause. The event was not repeated that summer, and I had probably the happiest summer of my life.

Cut to this fall, when classes start again. I'm still happier than I've ever been; my life finally seems in order, my band is doing amazingly well, I have lots of friends, my writing is going well and getting better by leaps and bounds, and all the things some of my teachers have been pounding into me for three years finally fall in place. So when I throw up again, I figured it was an isolated incident. No big deal. Maybe I ate too fast, or the food was wonky. But then it happens again. And again. What the...!?!?! There's no reason for this to be happening!

(On a side note, I've got my roommate totally trained in the eventuality that it happens: every time I start coughing after a meal, which is the usual prelude to the, ahem, "fireworks," my roommate goes into red alert mode and backs away. You'd have to see it; it's hysterical.)

It probably happens about every other meal now, or maybe every other two. It's not allergies or anything, at least as far as I can tell; I tried cutting out various things in my diet, and it continued. The weird thing is that I never feel sick or depressed or anything, it's just like "Whoops, here we go again..." I feel fine after it, and my appetite is completely undiminished. I simply clean up the mess (if there is one), wash out my mouth, and get on with life.

I laugh about it and make jokes (such as the titular joke), but in truth, it does scare me. I have to keep my sense of humor about it, though; if not, I'll just sit on the floor and cry (which is how my roommate, Colin, found me after the first time). He tried so hard not to laugh when he saw me sitting there in my umbros in the middle of this horrendous mess. He helped me clean it up (for which he deserves special compensation), and through his laughter (though I didn't appreciate it at the time), I gradually began to see the humor in the situation. God bless him for that. I'm glad I have him around, and I'm going to be sad to see him graduate this semester and leave.

In a way (and not to be melodramatic), it's a situation that's indicative of life. Sometimes life just kicks you in the gut, really hits you when you're down, but you have to get up, dust yourself and have a good laugh (or cry), then get moving again. That's what makes us human beings so amazing: out of all God's creation, we are the most infinitely adaptable. He built a sense of humor into us when He put us here, dusted off His hands, and probably said "Good thing I gave them that, they're gonna need it." And we do. I'm so immensely thankful for the people in my life. They remind me not to take everything seriously, and make me laugh when I start to forget to have fun. I love all of you (you know who you are).

In other news (news that isn't about vomiting, and aren't you glad?), my band is playing a show tonight at Vito's (in Valdosta), which is the first show we've played in the new venue. Hope you guys can come out, I'd love to see all of you.

And with that, I'll leave you with my

First Playlist I've Listed In Months:
Moonbabies- The Orange Billboard
Guided By Voices- Human Amusements At Hourly Rates
Yo La Tengo- Today Is the Day!
The Raveonettes- Chain Gang Of Love
M83- Dead Cities, Red Seas & Lost Ghosts
Coco B's/Eskimohunter- The Fast-Trak Holy Nova Symphony
Coco B's- Basement Songs: Firehawks and Dirtybirds EP1
Various Artists- Lost In Translation: Music from the Motion Picture Soundtrack
Brian Eno- Ambient 1: Music For Airports